The Committee recommends concurrence as amended as
follows:
Insert new item before "1. Begin sharing where we agree." and insert new
item following 11. "Utilize resources ... disagreement."in section entitled
Ministry of Mindfulness
To the people called United Methodists, with the hope that, through prayer and
holy conferencing, we will engage each other in love and grace as we deal with
issues upon which we disagree:
As a Church facing a new millennium we continue to disagree, sometimes
bitterly. Important biblical, theological and scientific questions remain in
dispute among persons of good will. This has been true on many issues
throughout the history of our denomination. Called as United Methodists to be
vigilant on issues of inclusiveness, we urge the Church to pause in reflection
on the process of disagreement. What hopes would we lift up for our own
denomination?
When we engage in deeply felt struggle for the truth, emotions run high. Our
human nature moves us to yearn for "victory" -
for
winning the debate, making judgment in hopes it will settle the controversy
that causes us discomfort and pain as a community. The "meaning" of any
communication has two parts: the content, ideas, or position on the issue, and
the feelings we have about those ideas. In prolonged disagreement, we may find
ourselves stepping on the feelings of others in our urgency to find the true,
winning position. We remind ourselves as a community of faith to remember who
we are, what both civil and religious communities perceive about us in our
discord, and what we have called ourselves to be as a Church.
Biblical and theological reflections and a Parable for our Time
In "The Ministry of all Christians," par. 117, we hold ourselves accountable
to this call:
"We recognize that God made all creation and saw that it was good. As a
diverse people of God who bring special gifts and evidences of God's grace to
the unity of the Church and to society, we are called to be faithful to the
example of Jesus' ministry to all persons."
We can heed this call to value all of God's creation as good, and all of God's
children capable of bringing special gifts to our Church and to society. These
special gifts can be gifts of engaged listening, careful feedback during
disagreement, and suspension of judgement and retribution. The diverse people
of God are indeed that - diverse. We do not always agree. But if we heed this
call to value all of God's creation, we show our world how to disagree in
remarkable and loving ways.
Jesus shared a parable that speaks powerfully to our time. In the parable of
the wheat and the weeds (Matt. 13:24-
30),
he shares a story about difference, discord, and judgment that becomes a
parable of grace. When asked if the weeds should not be culled from the wheat
field, the householder claimed the responsibility to judge what would happen to
the weeds when the harvest came. The householder did not dispute that there
were weeds in the fields, but the judgment of which were weeds and what would
happen to them was the householder's to make. The householder refuses to judge
at the beginning. This is a story about rushing to judgment, and Jesus shares a
caution based on our human nature to take action on assumptions that may or may
not be true. When separation is graciously postponed, what is perceived as weed
may be found to be wheat indeed!
The reign of God as we know it now, as we experience it, as we try to be
faithful within it, is not precise and neat and orderly. This imprecision comes
as a grace to us. First of all, it frees us from the building of walls that
exclude and efforts to have a "pure" community. Surely careful thought must be
given to the articulation of Christian doctrine and the exposition of Christian
behavior. But the grace of imprecision allows us to keep those who differ with
us within the concern and the care of God.
Secondly, strengthened and guided by the grace of God, saves us from
having to make the judgments that are beyond our competence. We we
must make our own prayerful decisions about good and evil, about right and
wrong as clearly as possible. But the ultimate judgment upon others and upon
ourselves is not ours to make. Only God can make such judgments, and in due
course this will be done. In the meantime, we must be more patient with one
another. Because we do not have to sort out now who is and who is not within
the reign of God, we can live with openness and freedom toward others. We must
not separate ourselves from those who see things differently. This is a parable
about grace and about being faithful in living it.
How shall we disagree?
In every community, there will be conflict and differences of opinion, some
quite strongly held. How we disagree, more so than which position prevails, has
a powerful impact on many audiences. As caring Christians, we carry
responsibility for this impact whether or not we are aware of it. These are
some of those audiences watching how we Christians disagree, argue, and debate
together:
young people, our youth and children who watch us as role models for their
lives,
our local congregations looking for wisdom and guidance in their ministry,
leaders of our nations and local communities worldwide,
those about whom we debate, for most discord is rooted in experiences of human
lives,
even the extreme example of less scrupulous, even reckless persons who may use
our
protestations and the invisible atmosphere our discord creates to justify
their acts of violence.
Power of a discerning question
In the midst of engaged debate, our ability to listen to one another can
weaken. True listening, hearing feelings as well as ideas, can be enhanced when
we can focus for a time on questions that help us discern one another's
positions on matters of importance. Questions that
might help us do this are:
1. How shall we agree to treat one another while we disagree?
2. How can we show hospitality to one another while we disagree?
3. What hopes for The United Methodist Church do we have in common?
4. When confronting divisive issues along which hard lines have been drawn, can
we temporarily suspend decision-making in order, through prayer, silence and
study, to discern the appropriate response for these times?
5. How can we use this period of discernment to deepen our understanding of all
positions on the issue?
6. Until we can agree on a resolution, can we agree to suspend motions,
decisions, policy development that will assert one position over the other?
7. How could we use this time of suspended judgment to deepen our understanding
of all positions on the issue?
8. What are the positive and negative effects of our disagreement on our
congregations, our members, our clergy and laity, and on the communities where
we serve?
9. What action as a community of faith should we take in light of these
effects?
10. What would we like the nature of our community in The United Methodist
Church to be when this issue that divides us is finally resolved?
Ministry of Mindfulness
Local congregations, study groups, cabinets, clusters and districts, annual,
central and General Conferences can be holy and hopeful places of discord.
Regardless of our positions on controversial issues, we can practice a ministry
of mindfulness of the impact of our discord. Some strategies may be helpful in
these settings:
Begin by sharing and studying relevant scripture, as scripture is our
primary authority, and also consulting additional aspects of the Wesleyan
quadrilateral -- tradition, reason, and experience.
1. Begin sharing where we agree.
2. Remember to honor our relationships to each other as children of
God. as we debate.
3. Practice the art of "feedback" - true feedback in which many positions are
shared and heard, and repeated back.
4. Place emphasis on the "spiritual discipline of true listening" - attending
and listening for the feelings of the others as well as their ideas.
5. Use facilitators to maintain safe spaces for difficult feelings and ideas to
be shared.
6. Address the issues. In the absence of consensus, share clearly and candidly
what we are willing to risk for the sake of justice and compassion.
7. Be mindful not to attack the messenger when discussing the message.
8. Use principles of mediation, focusing on interests (what we would like to
happen, how we would envision things to be) rather than the positions or stands
we take to get there.
9. Speak faithful hope for the possibility of future reconciliation and
resolution. What will it be like when we are through this discord?
10. Practice "holy conferencing" - infusing debate and dialogue with prayer,
silence, and more prayer. Pray for each other, for our church, for future
possibilities, for hope, and for guidance of the Holy Spirit as we move through
discord.
11. Utilize resources available to our groups, congregations, conferences and
agencies to strengthen our sense of community, especially in disagreement.
12. Pray for and practice the discipline of patience. Forging new
understandings and agreements will take intentional effort.
Info About Calendar Item 798-NonDis